Manners, Customs and the Japanese way

Manners, Customs and the Japanese way

Manners and customs are an important part of many facets of Japanese life. Japanese people will grow up picking up the subtleties of this unique culture as they go through life, respecting the invisible and varied societal rules. There are many aspects of this seemingly complicated culture that as a foreign visitor, you will not be expected to know, but there are some things that will be easier to grasp than others.

Bowing

One of the most obvious social conventions is the bow. Everyone bows when they say hello, goodbye, thank you or sorry. Bowing is a term of respect, remorse, gratitude and greeting.

If you meet someone in Japan you may wish to give them a little bow, but you do not necessarily need to bow to everyone who bows to you. Entering a shop or restaurant for example, you will be greeted by shouts of ‘irrashaimase’ (welcome) and a bow from the staff as a sign of respect to you as the customer. As the customer, you will not be expected to bow back as you could be facing a long bow-off as the staff will feel it necessary to bow back to you. You may prefer to adopt the casual head-nod version of the bow as a sign of acknowledgement when thanked for your purchase at the end of your shopping experience. Many Japanese people use the head-nod in more casual everyday situations.

There are several forms of bowing such as the 45 degree ‘Saikeirei’ bow used for moments for sincere apology or to show the highest of respect, or the 30 degree ‘Keirei’ bow which is also used to show respect to superiors. As a visitor to Japan you will probably have no use for wither of these. The ‘Eshaku’ 15 degree bow is used for greetings when meeting people for the first time and is semi formal.  You may have more use for this bow during your time in Japan, but you will not be expected to use it and Japanese these days are more than familiar with shaking hands.

Taking off footwear

This is something that confuses many visitors to Japan, but is so easy to understand. It is customary in Japan to take off your shoes when entering a traditional ryokan (guesthouse), a home, temple or the occasional restaurant for example. Traditionally, the Japanese took off shoes entering homes as people would sleep, sit and eat on the tatami matted floors and footwear worn outside would spread dirt across their living area. Today people still take off their footwear, partly to keep the inside of the building clean, but also as a sign of respect.

As a visitor to Japan, you may not find yourself entering too many private homes but you will probably find yourself in a traditional ryokan or Minshuku guest house or entering a temple building and you will be expected to take off your shoes. You will enter a building and often find yourself in the ‘genkan’ (entrance hall) which will usually be on a slightly different level to the rest of the floor. You may see a sign asking you to take of shoes, you may see lots of shoes sitting neatly or you may see an area or lockers to place your footwear, all signs that you should take off your shoes.

Most Japanese will glide effortlessly in and out of their footwear from ‘genkan’ to tatami floor in one swift move. As soon as you step out of your shoes, step up straight onto the main floor and to be polite, you might like to turn around and reposition your shoes neatly or put them in the appropriate place. Although you may not have mastered taking off your shoes as well as the Japanese, it is a simple concept that is considered vey important in Japan.

Other social tips

Respect

    The suffix “san” is often used when you refer to someone else and is a term of respect. If referring to Mr/Mrs Suzuki, you would say, “Suzuki san”. However, you would never refer to yourself as “-san” and would only use your name on its own.

Eating

    Before eating a meal, Japanese put their hands together and use the term “Itadakimasu” (I humbly receive). After the meal, it is polite to say “Gochiso sama deshita” (thank you for the meal).
    Japanese will understand if visitors do not have proficient use of chopsticks but there are some rules you should try and follow;
    Do not stick your chopsticks into your bowl of rice or pass food around with them. As well as being slightly uncouth, these actions have relevance to the Japanese funeral ceremony.
    It is also advisable not to douse your rice in soy sauce. Japanese are very proud of their rice and this seemingly innocent action may surprise and even offend some ryokan/restaurant owners.
    It is not common practice to walk and eat in public and is considered bad manners. You may sit down in a public place and eat or stand at “tachi-gui” restaurant/shops, but walking and eating is not polite.
    There is no tipping in Japanese restaurants or other places that many westerners will expect to tip. The Japanese will always give the best service they can and do their jobs proudly. A waiter or chef would certainly not accept a tip for doing their jobs and if you tried to leave one, they would awkwardly return your money, so don’t tip. 

There are many social conventions in Japan which westerners might find hard to understand, but that is the nature of different cultures and is part of the fun about being in a country like Japan. Although it is nice if you are able to respect every social custom, as a visitor you will not be expected to know them all. A little bit of respect goes a long way in Japan and your sensitivity will be appreciated.